January 26, 2006
-- by Thomas Leavitt
Mark Morford's latest column, entitled: Horse Sex Porn Candy Teens!, asks the question: "Is Bush a fascist?" (evidence would seem to indicate so; as Mark points out, Bush "has slapped his color-crayon signature on over 500 signing statements so far, reserving his right to disregard the law more times than all former American presidents combined." Read the column for the ultimate irony re: this subject.)
He also suggests that we type in the following search terms, in an effort to confound the Justice Department's attempt to revive COPA (the Child Online Protection Act)... which is the biggest joke imaginable; do you have a child between the ages of 8 and 13? do they have access to chat, etc. on NeoPets? are they on MySpace? are they on AIM or Yahoo Messenger? I bet they are. ... and I bet you've never signed any sort of permission form. In my view, COPA actually accomplishes exactly the opposite: all those kids are busy lying about their age right and left, pretending to be 14, 15, 17, 19, 24, or even 30... and interacting with folks who are really that age... this has the perverse effect of further accelerating an already absurd premature teenhood and adulthood and overhyped sexuality (the link takes you to True.com, an advertisement for which greeted me on login). ... amazingly, most of these kid's profiles are pretty normal, but some of them just leave you shaking your head.
... rant off. Now, on with "Operation Screw With the DOJ and Make Lynne Cheney Squirm." Make sure you type the following into Google (and it wouldn't hurt to add them to your blog, or web page, too):
hot bunny terrorist fluffer banana
Osama butt pancake lube explosives yay
homemade nuke porn lollipop kiddie nipple bomb!!!
As Mark says:
Up, off the couch. Log in to Google. Type "Karl Rove eaten by giant homosexual squid." Type "George W. Bush beaten to lifeless pulp by swarm of angry kindergarten children." Enter "Samuel Alito loves his 'Weapons of Ass Destruction IV' DVD." It might not be much, but it sure sends the right kind of message. Don't you agree?
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